Honest

Oneword.com  gave me the title =]

The truth 
no hiding behind lies
trust the ones you care
to be it
trust your instincts 
to sense it
trust me
i'll trust you
we need this.

Through A Glass

The world spins
positively
everything
in a glowing angle
so many cares
and no worry
wonderful.

PS slightly drunk... Sorry

Vicious

Skin itches 
with the looks of that
scathing gaze.


Her mouth curled
in to a tight lipped
smug smile
but of course,
moves when she whispers. 


Always aware 
of her sitting there
with the scathing glare
and that god damn
perfect hair. 

Relax

Rest,
Easy,
Live ,
At a good pace
(ignore) x rated hatred.  

Bit shit. I'm tired. Shut up. 

Under the Lights, Behind the Mirror

The fragile esteem 
slowly crawling it's way 
out of the raging shadows
of torment and loathing 
clinging to the edges of the skin
let me stay, let me stay
it begs 
before being thrown back 
at the reflection
lost in the morphing mirror. 


And then.


Pathetically
looks up 
when the male gaze follows 
smiles
in the low lights of a club
the gaze glazed by drink 
sits on the shoulder
look, you've got something
right? 

When I Was Your Age

Think I mentioned my idea for this a few posts ago? I got it yesterday =]

But not writing a poem about it because the seems silly xD 

When I was your age

I wasn't like that, right? 

I was older when I did that

and that 

most definitely that

Or maybe they're not the ones

growing up too quickly

I am.

And as the technology increases

so does the ageing process

leaving us reeling 

and trying 

to keep a firm grasp 

on our own reality

and look back fondly

on the fantasy 

of when we were that age. 

Sunshine, De-stress Time

I finished exams today :D

Relief
pours through the system
shoulders relax
palms are light
pair this with blue skies
and smudges of white
lime green grass underfoot
there's nothing to do
but smile
and enjoy the sunshine.

Forward. Or Not.

One step forward
feeling confident 
a whisper
a look
a shiver across
the shoulders
and down the spine
doubt flickers 
one step back
and then another
a nod
better
arm folded
shoulders now hunched
don't do that again.

Flashes From Childhood [and a thank you from the halfway point]

Dragons
Dalmatians

trying to see over a wall
or the car seat window 
excitement 
disbelief 
dandelion wishes 
imagination 
baths 
visits to the library 
books upon books
giggles 
shorts in autumn 
large chairs 
wide eyed stares
melted kitkats 
sand forts fighting 
the tide
flume in the pool
rapids outside
me
lost in my own world. 


PS - 23.06.11


So I just looked at my blog posts and I think this is number 182, meaning that I'm halfway through with this o.o I didn't think I'd get this far to be honest, I know most of the poems aren't amazing but I'm still quite proud for getting to this point. 

And I suppose this is kind of good poem for this fall on to (something I didn't plan) Moving from childhood innocence, to trying to capture the imagination once held so easily but now with an older mind. I don't know, I suppose I'm just trying to see the world through lots of different eyes so I don't get sick of the picture. This kind of helps for it makes it me think what can be a poem, what inspires me, what do people like...

Anyway,

I want to thank you, whether you're one of my friends, random internet stranger, bored browser, for reading this. I can't really believe how many countries have viewed this page! Thank you and I really hope you like at least one poem :') Feel free to stick around to see if I make it through the other half of the year. 

The Things I Couldn't Say

My mouth breathed
out the word thank you
tears choking back the rest
but what i wanted to say
right there, just today : 


I love you
You're always there
you do so much 
and know what just to say
you never let anything
stand in my way
I don't know what I'd do 
without you
always by my side,
you can't pick your family
but I sure as hell
love mine.

Enriching Life

Never enough
Always want to buy
something
the next thing
the better thing
but not everything 
just what you want 
what you need


Not needed to be happy
for they say that
the best things in life are free,
laughing
family
smiles
friends
hugs
sunshine
the smell of cut grass 
love


But really
most likely 
everybody wants
some more money. 


Yes, the last verse is meant to be smaller. 

Held

Oneword.com for title. Tried to link it to father's day then spiralled  bit in to other things that reminded me of the word. I don't know, just hope it doesn't sound incesty, it's not meant to xD

Family
A mother and child
Or on the back of father
tiny arms round the neck
or.


Lovers
Hands together
longing forever
Safe
Always 
never thinking 
of the moment
of letting go. 

A Poem From Back in the Day :')

So I just found lots of emo-esque poems I wrote when I was 14 or 15 :') Dearie me they're shit. 
I thought I'd post one of my old poems, this one is the best of bunch. Mainly because I'm not whining xD
Also the picture is taken by me, I used to do that sort of stuff a lot when I was bored. 
Well, this has turned in to a nostalgic blog post.

Watching From my Window

The clouds chase each other across the sapphire sky

The branches of trees gently waving at passers by

The streaks of white from planes interrupting the clouds

The rays of the sun giving the tops of houses a cosy glow

The buds on stems beginning to grow

A black bird chirping on a hedge

The cracking white paint on my window ledge

The boredom

The peace

The spring

The time to sit

and do nothing.

Wonder

Quite a childish, simple one today. Oh well. I got the title from oneword.com 

I wonder what will become of you
and what will become of me
Will we grow together?
Will we be free?


I wonder how the moon spins
I wonder about the stars
I wonder whether if if there really
is, life on the planet Mars. 


I wonder if we see colour
all in the same light 
I wonder if anyone thinks of me
late in to the night. 


I wonder if about the wind 
what shade would it be
but really,
most of all
I just wonder about you and me. 

Knocking Heart

The heart knocks against the chest

like a desperate pounding fist 

striking against a door

while the feet become 

unsure of the floor. 

Aware of it knocking

always knocking

boom boom boom

you can't answer it

bones  are blocking your way

boom boom boom

faster now

boomboomboomboomboom

boomboomboomboomboom

Your nerves shiver 

get me out

get me out of this room. 

Lists

I aim to read all of this at some point (guess what film I like)


Pretty much no idea what to write, just typed out words and tried to link it up. Blah exams -.- 

1 heart
10 fingers
10 toes
2 kidneys 
2 eyes 
Countless hair
(unless bald) 


Petals
leaves 
bark
grass
soft 


Butter
toast
salt
pepper


Doctor
nurse
care
kind
love


One heart.
Actually
make it two. 

Elusive Esteem

I need more confidence in myself
for what little skills I have
are placed on a shelf
and they're far out of my reach. 


I can see them
but usually doubt
if they're there
do I still own them
are they even mine?
Perhaps,
one day
I'll be able to climb. 

The Garden Girl

No picture since I've got my own in my head and hope other people can make one for themselves...


As the grass cried dew
she looked for no one,
no one but you.


Silver mist stroked the sky
she couldn't help
but wonder why.


Eyes deep with love 
head tilted upwards
in awe at the stars above.


Here she will wait 
maybe just forever
until you and her 
may be together. 

Glasses

Do they hide the eyes
the windows the soul
cover the face
make you a disgrace?


Or they add to the structure
of the bones
the cheeks
to the eyes
adding an element
of mystery
maybe a surprise


Nerd.
Sophisticated. 
Hidden.
Intelligent.
You'd think I'd be
able to figure it out
considering
what's on my face. 

Friends

They 
know
like
talk to
text
phone
hug
put up with
understand
be there for
care about
amuse
miss
rarely annoy
stick with
me.

Failing at the Art of Conversation

Shunned to the side
left in the shadows 
to focus on flaws.
Arms crossed
face the floor
and realise the largest
flaw of all
is the fact you're
here
in the shadows 
in the first place. 

Rubber Band Brain

A rubber band stretches 
across the brain
causing slight,
mild pain.


But then.


It's night
head hits the pillow
the band snaps
thoughts held back
tumble forward
with the force 
of a tsunami.


And yet.


The hands of the clock
manage to move
the night continues.

Well Worn World

Because I've been reading Harry Potter in my revision breaks and I've realised how nice it is sinking in to the familiarity of it. No matter how many times I read it, I get absorbed and enjoy it and for half an hour or so I forget my stress. 

The turn of a page
words welcoming you
like the comfort of
an arm around the shoulder
or a smile
from a friend
in a room full of strangers. 
Easily sinking in
to the known world
like a bath
heated up just right.


Well worn spine
creased pages
cracked cover
no where near perfection
but it's the flaws
that make it mine. 

Memories

Memories fading
but please don't let me
forget them
all together 
let me store them
and re visit 
if I ever feel lost
don't let my mind
loose what was once 
treasured.


Please,
I'm begging
whoever is listening
let those photos 
of me smiling
trigger something
anything
rather than against
strike a blank canvas. 

THe Harshest of Judges

You think everybody is looking
judging your every move
but few
if any
are actually watching you. 


Nobody cares really
about that mistake
well, 
they might do
just nowhere near
as much you. 


The mirror is the enemy
for it highlights every flaw
makes your eyes
downcast
and you memorize the floor.


We don't realize 
we're selfish
since we are too busy 
focusing
on ourselves. 

If Silence Had a Voice

If silence had a voice
it would soothe your tears
whisper viciously your fears 
create conversation
when its god damn sick of having
to make an appearance
encourage flirtation
if you're with that someone
and you don't know what to say.


If silence had a voice
it would unravel all your secrets
but not tell them to a soul 
for it knows you
and when you don't say anything
there's a reason 
and to breech such a trust
would be the harshest of treason. 

Pressure

Pushing down 
on the shoulders
Stamping on the brain 
yelling,
work
work now 
you do know what will
happen
if you don't?


Future looming
darker than night
with eyes closed
heavier than dark matter
forcing you down
down.


But


Hope
a slim ray of light
seen through the crack
of the open eye lids 
that maybe
possibly 
you'll be OK.


Then


Storm clouds 
roll over
shoulders pushed back
work
work now
do you know what will 
happen
if you don't?

Natural Reactions

A spider crawls up 
the veins
it's leg brushing the skin
it scuttles across the shoulders
almost as if sinking in.


A rock plunges
in to the pool of the heart
freezing ripples spread
through out the body
muscles quickly torn apart. 


A gloved hand 
strokes the face
red spreads, quick 
the hands go slick. 

Dreams

The longer to sleep
is longer to dream 
to delve in to the stories
of the subconscious


Resting between
the moon and the stars
until the sun decides to rise
finding a surprise,
the unexpected 


But then waking
and the stories and
the twists
slowly forgotten
in the light of the sun
awaiting to be remembered
in the glow of the stars. 

The Door Mat

Welcome
come on in
footsteps dig
in deep
wiping mud
everywhere
not bothering
to look back.


Do you need anything?
Yes,
you reply
everything 
Get me it
you say
now


That's fine
Hold on
let me lie down
and you can walk
all over me
will that suffice?
For now
you say
arms crossed
wanting more
always more
despite the little
left to take.